Thursday, July 8, 2010

Attack of the Nerds

Franklin , Tennessee - BVD News-Tuesday night , police officers were rudely awakened from their slumber @ "The Crib" , ass they made their way over to Puckett’s Grocery, 120 4th Avenue South , at 11:18 pm after an alert citizen witnessed three males spray painting graffiti at 130 4th Avenue South. The citizen saw the suspects climb onto the roof of the District Attorney’s Office , where they were captured by police.

Robert Herron , 22 of Brentwood and Tripp Weir , 20 of Franklin , along with a 17-year old male from Nashville were arrested and charged with Felony Vandalism. Herron and Weir were also charged with Contributing to the Delinquency of a Minor. They were booked into the Williamson County Jail , released on a $2,500 bond , and are due in court on 07/15/2010 at 2:00 pm. The minor, charged with Felony Vandalism and Violation of the State’s curfew, was transported to Juvenile Services , and later released to a parent.

Herron, Robert Weir, Tripp
Robert J. Herron Tripp A. Weir
Date of Birth: 03/14/1988
Date of Birth: 09/07/1989
5112 Cornwall Drive 1006 Boxwood Drive
Brentwood, TN 37027 Franklin, TN 37064

Franklin’s 4th Avenue Parking Garage was vandalized in several areas , along with the downtown Law Offices of Puryear, Newman , and Morton. The suspects were found in possession of two backpacks full of spray paint and stencils. Also found in their possession were a video and still camera they used to document their crimes.


BVD: Chief , what's going on around here?

Chief: Ass he wiped the slumber from his eyes , our police Chief yawned ass he remarked , "Thank God someone did something for a change that didn't swindle the public out of moore of their pocket money. Those guys even made us a video , to show off their crime , just in case there were no witnesses."

BVD: Hey uh , Chief? Why is it , it seems there's more stupid Shit going on behind your backs , now that your people have settled into their new Crib?

Chief: Huh? What 'r U talkin 'bout?

BVD: I'm talking about guns at the movies , graffiti on the court house , graffiti on "The Crib" walls of justice , a stolen money machine , patrol cars without condoms , semen on the courthouse walls , kiddie porn in the city administrator's desk and black paint on the patrol cars. You know , the everyday , usual stuff.

Chief: I don't know nuthin 'bout that -pause- HEY! Wait a minute. Black paint on our patrol cars? By golly I'm gonna investigate this one myself. I'll get the Bastard who's putting black paint on "MY" police cars. I swear I'll get that Bastard. Black paint my ass , I'll show 'em who's da boss 'round here. Black paint on a police car. Just who do they think they're messin with?

BVD: I'm sure you will chief. I guess no one told you about the new black 'n white scheme for the new police cars.

Chief: Oh uh , that's right. Why thank you BVD. Because of your help , I solved that crime in no time. This town needs more people like you , you know that , BVD?